Such is my life lately. The 12 year old brain is promising to do me in. I have read that the brain of adolescents rebuilds itself, which is why they can so often seem to be totally lacking in good judgement. It seemed to such a reasonable hypothesis from the comfortable distance of age 8 or 9. Living life with a person who is experiencing brain rebuilding is slightly less interesting from a scientific perspective and hugely more irritating.
I have been trying to figure out what exactly about recent...um...events...that has been so challenging and I think it is the shock factor. One day you believe that certain life lessons have been well absorbed and are thus no longer an issue. And then you come home to find two people engaged in a physical and mental battle to the death, dinner has been dumped in the garbage because "I hate black beans," and a charming note on your bed stating "keep your crap out of my room."
Where do you even begin?
I have been trying not to go into some automatic parental mode whereby I replicate every action and reaction that my parents had with me (not that they did such a terrible job, but there are areas worthy of improvement). Also, it seems like some consciousness about what is happening on the part of at least one of us would be a welcome thing. But this it is very difficult! More than once I have had that disquieting experience of hearing my mother come out of my mouth. And then my father.
Dang it! Why can't these children understand that my waters are still very cloudy over here? Instead it is ding, ding, ding, pushing those buttons fast and furious. Is there a pause button somewhere?