I know I have said it before here, since I say it to anyone who will listen, but the best advice ever given to me was to just point yourself in the direction you want to go and see what happens. Really, this is all one can do so why worry about anything else?
Many times over the years, I have come to the conclusion that I should give up on this notion of being an artist. That flood of questions comes raining down hard: why make art? what use does it have? should I be doing something else? Those questions seem to end with the answer that it is time to finally let go of this label of artist, this ambition, this drive. Every single time I have had this conversation with myself, something happens that makes me believe the universe is saying "not yet!" A curator asks me to propose an exhibition, a grant proposal comes up successful, or I get a phone call from David Blumenthal aka the Tony Soprano of the Yarn World. So I keep pointing in that direction.
Lately, I have been giving lots of thought to the idea that each thing we do is like giving birth: it wants nurturing and it requires our time, energy and attention. As someone who loves to take on a lot of things at once, I have finally begun to realize that I need to focus my energies more specifically. As I scanned my list of activities, I looked for something that I could give up without too much pain. Art? No. Yoga? No. Zen practice? No. My children? No. Spinning? Maybe.
Ok, maybe not spinning forever but spinning for money. Thus, my scaling back the etsy shop and limiting my work spinning to the two shops in St. John's. And then the Universe said, "Hold on a minute!"
When I posted that photograph of the yarn I made that was inspired by Anne Dinan's jewelry, another friend asked if I could make more, enough for a baby sweater. And so it was that I carded up and spun more yesterday.
Three more skeins:
Sometimes, however, I think you need to talk back to the Universe. So, Universe, if you are listening, while I appreciate the encouragement, I still want to ease off the spinning for gold. Thanks!
Meanwhile, yesterday, it seemed like the whole Universe was sparkling!
It gets worse as you get older, Robyn. I remember when I turned 50, I freaked out that I might not live long enough to do all the things I want to do, or almost as bad, finish all my UFOs. Turning 60 was a real come to Jesus meeting about what to spend time on and what I'll just have to put on the back burner, or leave behind. In the end, it feels lighter. Enjoy your spinning...spin and knit it for yourself! (There's a concept few of us follow.) XXX
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