Friday, February 19, 2016

Your Life is in Your Hands

In Nashville, I had a nice little morning routine going.  Get up around 5:30, do my abhyanga (ayurvedic oiling), pour out a 1/4 cup of pomegranate juice, make a cup of tea, do some asana or some zazen, drink said tea, take a shower, drink said pomegranate juice, then go to our morning group practice at 7 am.  The day would flow from there.  As someone who has resisted schedules and routines and list making like the plague, the fact that this morning ritual brought such a sense of order and grounding to the hectic, relentless pace of our time was a bit of a surprise.

Not just about the coffee....

And it was no surprise at all.  I know that a self care routine is a good thing.  Knowing it and living are two different things.  Coming back to New York, I immediately fell into my old ways of waking up at various times each day, making lots of last minute decisions about whether or not to include this or that practice in my morning.  Suddenly I was aware of how it all felt kind of off somehow.  Then I had a thought - this is my life.  And a second thought - this is my body.  I may not be in control of either of those two things but I am in charge of them.

Somehow, after years of various practices and disciplines, I still was holding on to the idea that everything was outside of me, beyond my doing.  But, in fact, it is as simple as: get up at 5:30 am, rub some oil on, make tea and so on.  No one is telling me to do it.  No one is asking me to do it.  No one is watching me do it.  Indeed, having stretched your patience and goodwill with even writing this blog post, no one cares one whit whether or not I do it.  And this, my beauties, allows me the most wonderful freedom to just do it.

No need to speak of it futther.

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